30. July 2008 by John Arnold.

I’d heard of A Perfect Circle, of course. But I’d never felt them before.

I was actually looking to download some Tool from iTunes. Silly me. Apparently, you cannot get Tool from iTunes. I’m sure this is not hurting Tool in anyway - just idiots like me who depend on iTunes for the bulk of their music. Even more exacerbating is the the fact that at my local Best Buy (no links for the Dark Side), I can’t find Tool cds. When I do manage to divert one of the pimple-faced customer-profiling zombatrons from their zone sweeps to ask about Tool, they usually tell me Sears is at the other end of the mall. Such is the travesty of living in a small town. Don’t get me wrong. I love the shit in Best Buy, but the people working there… I’ve seen more friendly bouncers at biker bars I wouldn’t throw my grandmother into without and 8-ball, a big knife, and a huge stash of cash to either buy her way out with or purchase sex from some guy named ‘Skids’.

Anyway - A Perfect Circle. Fucking genius. Here I am, whining to my friend that I can’t find Tool on iTunes and she says “You should check out A Perfect Circle.” Well, I already had a couple of songs by them on my iPod. (By the way, I’m really getting sick of iThis and iThat. Next time I go to the iDoctor, I’ll make sure to tell him I have a family history and he needs to check out my iProstate for iCancer).  But, I digress.

I am lost in a fugue of brilliant emotive eloquence and I am ecstatic about it.  This is exactly what music is intended for.  If the music you’re listening to doesn’t allow you to take wing and soar, it’s not worth listening to.  I’m a musician - always have been.  Music is a powerful coalescing force inside me, screaming to get out, searching frantically for a voice, an outlet, an avenue for anger, loss, love, joy.  It’s absolute feeling.  Mine comes out on six strings but the stream is carried in the lyrics.

 Wake up and face me.  Don’t play dead…  This song, “Passive” just screams what I can’t write for myself.  I don’t know what moves me more, “I’m dead as dead can be” or “You fucking disappoint me”… “Go ahead and play dead… you fucking disappont me.”  It’s easy to get lost in this.  Every now and then you find a perfect song at the perfect time and you become a fan for life.  It’s the in-between spaces that music carries me through.  If you’re reading this and you think I’m referring to you, no matter how obliquely, you’re probably right.

“Someday, maybe, I will walk away and say  you fucking disappoint me.”

Yeah.  Passive-Aggressive Bullshit.  Maybe you’re better off this way.

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28. July 2008 by John Arnold.

Typically, when I think of weapons and musical instrument cases - which is not something I do very often - I think of violin cases and Tommy Guns.  Good old Al Capone-style stuff.  I’ve never really envisioned somebody pulling a 12-gauge shotgun out of a guitar case, which was the case today in Tennessee when some idiot walked into a church and opened up on the congregation, killing two and leaving at least five others in either serious or critical condition.  As a children’s play, based on the musical “Annie”, was being performed at the time, it’s amazing and fortunate that no children were hurt.  According to witnesses at the scene this was due to one of the victims, who was described by a witness as a ‘refrigerator with a head’, interjecting himself between the shotgun and the congregation.

Society today is filled with tragedy and heroism.  The tragedy of the acts perpetuated by those consumed by hate, intolerance and irrationally perceived personal affronts are counter-balanced by the unselfish and unthinking acts of instinct for preservation, whether for self or others, of those such as Greg McKendry.  I don’t know the man, never met him in my life, never even heard of him before today, but I know many like him.  They are all around us.  If we’re lucky, we can even count ourselves among them.

I generally like to make fun of everything - poke holes in the fabric of the thought and the rationalizaton that serves as such a pitiful attempt to mask the absurdity around us.  There’s nothing laughable about this story - other than the laudable attempt of the writers to clarify to those of us living in the trees on insects and fruit what exactly a shotgun is… 

Is there such a thing as ‘holy ground’ anymore?  There used to be a time that you could safely sit next to your mortal enemy in a church, even though prudence dictated that you may want to leave by separate exits after the services.  I’m sure that the anti-gun movement will add this tragedy to their stockpile of ammunition in their war on guns.  Of course, the other side will point to the efficacy of concealed carry laws in deterring crimes such as this.  If we keep heading down this road with church shootings, I see one of two things happening, neither more laughable than the other: 1) An appearance of metal detectors at church entrances or 2) half the congregation packing heat.  You tell me, which is more absurd?

If a guy wants to walk into a church and start blasting, he should have the balls to leave the guitar case in the truck.  If he believes so strongly in his twisted sickness, he should have the courage to declare himself and be ready to fight for those beliefs instead of waiting to declare until he’s safely inside the sanctuary of his defenseless victims. Jim D. Adkisson, you are a worthless coward and a loser.  Guitar cases are for guitars and shotguns are for enthusiasts.  You are neither.  I hope you like anal sex…

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21. July 2008 by John Arnold.

Shit happened.  It’s still happening.  Get over it.

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